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You might be from a small town if...

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛1. You can name everyone in your school.

2. You went to parties in a field, a bush, a gravel pit, or in the middle of a dirt road (and the party couldn't start until someone with a big stereo in their truck showed up).

3. You used to cruise "main".

4. You got a fine and your parents knew within the hour.

5. You scheduled parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't.

6. You could never buy cigarettes or booze because all the store clerks knew how old you were.

7. When you did find somebody old enough to buy cigarettes/booze, you still had to go out to the country and drive on back roads to smoke and drink.

8. It was cool to date somebody from the neighboring town.

9. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.

10. You don't give directions by street names, but by references (turn by the Clarke's house, go 2 blocks past the Hounsell's, and it's four houses left of the track field).

11 The golf course had only 9 holes.

12. You can't help but date a friend's ex-boyfriend/ girlfriend.

13. Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads and you will never own a light-coloured vehicle for this reason.

14. The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", but is actually just like your town.

15. You refer to anyone with a house newer then 1980 as "the rich people".

16. The people in the "big city" dress funny - then you pick up the trend 2 years later.

17. Anyone you want to find can be found at either the 7-11,the Pool Hall, or Lumber House.

18. Directions are given using the 4-way stop as a reference.

19. You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask you if you want a ride somewhere.

20. Your teachers call you by your older siblings' names.

21. Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.

22. You can charge at all the local stores or write cheques without any i.d.

23. The closest Dairy Queen is 45 miles away (or more).

24. The best mall is over an hour away.

25. It is normal to see an old man picking bottles in the ditch .......and you know his name.

26. Everyone who played sports had to play on every type of team, or there wouldn't be enough people to have a team.

27. Being able to hit a road sign with a beer bottle while driving down the highway is considered a necessary skill.

28. A cool vehicle had big tires or a bad-ass stereo.

29. You can remember when your town finally got cable.

30. Driving to the party on a four wheeler is quite normal.

31. You thought the 30-year-old guy that was at all the parties was cool.

32. The whole town wreaks when the fish trucks drive through.

33. The town population increases by one-third when the universities go on break.

34. The best burgers in town are at the rink.

35. You know exactly where to go when the party is at "the lake".

36. You lost your virginity at a bush party.

37. You laugh 'til your sides hurt reading this because you know it is all true and you forward it to everyone who lives in your town .because you know them all!!!更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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  • 枫下家园 / 医药保健 / LAUGHTER, THE BEST MEDICINE.
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛Heaven's New Policy

    It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance policy. The new law was that, in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a really bad day when you died. The policy would go into effect at noon the next day. The next day at 12:01, the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly said to the man, "Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was going when you died." "No problem," the man said. "I came home to my 25th floor apartment on my lunch hour and caught my wife half naked. She appeared to be having an affair, but her lover was nowhere in sight. I immediately began searching for him. My wife was yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment. Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the balcony and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips! The nerve of that guy! Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But wouldn't you know it, he landed in some trees and bushes that broke his fall and he didn't die. This pissed me off even more. In a rage, I went back inside to get the first thing I could get my hands on to throw at him. Oddly enough, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony, and tipped it over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him! The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack and died almost instantly."

    The Angel sat back and thought a moment.
    Technically, the guy did have a bad day. It was a crime of passion. So, the Angel announced, "Ok, sir. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and let him in.

    A few seconds later the next guy came up. The Angel said, "Before I can let you in, I need to hear about what your day was like when you died."

    "No problem," said the second man. "But you're not going to believe this. I was on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises. Having been under a lot of pressure I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I guess I got a little carried away, slipped, and accidentally fell over the side! Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below mine. But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his apartment, started cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of course I fell. I hit some trees and bushes at the bottom which broke my fall so I didn't die right away. As I'm laying there face up on the ground, unable to move, and in excruciating pain, I see this guy push his refrigerator, of all things, off the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me, killing me instantly."

    The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his story. "I could get used to this new policy," he thinks to himself. "Very well," the Angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of
    Heaven," and he lets the man enter.

    A few seconds later, a third man comes up to the gate. The angel says, "Please tell me how you died." The third man says, "Ok, picture this. I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator...."更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • You might be from a small town if...
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛1. You can name everyone in your school.

      2. You went to parties in a field, a bush, a gravel pit, or in the middle of a dirt road (and the party couldn't start until someone with a big stereo in their truck showed up).

      3. You used to cruise "main".

      4. You got a fine and your parents knew within the hour.

      5. You scheduled parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't.

      6. You could never buy cigarettes or booze because all the store clerks knew how old you were.

      7. When you did find somebody old enough to buy cigarettes/booze, you still had to go out to the country and drive on back roads to smoke and drink.

      8. It was cool to date somebody from the neighboring town.

      9. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.

      10. You don't give directions by street names, but by references (turn by the Clarke's house, go 2 blocks past the Hounsell's, and it's four houses left of the track field).

      11 The golf course had only 9 holes.

      12. You can't help but date a friend's ex-boyfriend/ girlfriend.

      13. Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads and you will never own a light-coloured vehicle for this reason.

      14. The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", but is actually just like your town.

      15. You refer to anyone with a house newer then 1980 as "the rich people".

      16. The people in the "big city" dress funny - then you pick up the trend 2 years later.

      17. Anyone you want to find can be found at either the 7-11,the Pool Hall, or Lumber House.

      18. Directions are given using the 4-way stop as a reference.

      19. You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask you if you want a ride somewhere.

      20. Your teachers call you by your older siblings' names.

      21. Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.

      22. You can charge at all the local stores or write cheques without any i.d.

      23. The closest Dairy Queen is 45 miles away (or more).

      24. The best mall is over an hour away.

      25. It is normal to see an old man picking bottles in the ditch .......and you know his name.

      26. Everyone who played sports had to play on every type of team, or there wouldn't be enough people to have a team.

      27. Being able to hit a road sign with a beer bottle while driving down the highway is considered a necessary skill.

      28. A cool vehicle had big tires or a bad-ass stereo.

      29. You can remember when your town finally got cable.

      30. Driving to the party on a four wheeler is quite normal.

      31. You thought the 30-year-old guy that was at all the parties was cool.

      32. The whole town wreaks when the fish trucks drive through.

      33. The town population increases by one-third when the universities go on break.

      34. The best burgers in town are at the rink.

      35. You know exactly where to go when the party is at "the lake".

      36. You lost your virginity at a bush party.

      37. You laugh 'til your sides hurt reading this because you know it is all true and you forward it to everyone who lives in your town .because you know them all!!!更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net